You were never meant to do it alone

I’ve been having lots of conversations recently about parenting – the energy frazzling challenges (and of course the returns) of being a present, conscious, supportive, responsive not reactive, healthy, fulfilled parent and all the other things you need to be and do in life.

I’m not a parent but I'm a woman that loves, supports and learns from many in my life who are.

For many, raising the children has become the sole responsibility of two parents, or for some, even just one parent.   

It was never meant to be like this. 

 A very dear friend, and parent, shared the following quote from Sheryl Paul with me – "We often hear, 'it takes a village to raise a child’, it also takes a village to support a parent." 

 Like parenting; work, leading people, projects, ideas, movements, life...we were never meant to do it alone.  

With the emphasis on individualism, achievement as the sole measure of success, the ease of travel and being able to live in faraway places away from friends, family, support systems, and for many, fractured family and close relationships, mean that there’s a prevalent belief that we have to figure things out all by ourselves.  

Many modern and past day ‘heroes’ of business and success often seem to be painted as self-made lone rangers that have got where they are or achieved what they’ve achieved alone, with the support, expertise, experiences and risk taking of others often missing from the story.

I loved how, after his recent concert at The Royal Albert Hall, British musician and actor, Kano, recently named the long list of all the people - musicians, engineers, producers, artists, promoters, managers - that supported him to make his performance what it was.

 Yes often there’s too many to name, and that’s the point.

 Honour those that came before you (it doesn’t always have or need to be public), that enable you to do the work you do and actively seek out support - people (and there will be many in different shapes and forms) that you resonate with, that offer you nourishment, challenge, fresh perspectives, a non-judgmental listening ear, strengths, space, and have trodden paths of experience in similar, and different, areas of life and work to you.

 It really does take a village. You were never meant to do it alone.